How do I get beyond my disability to really relate to others like I did before? This is a question I ask myself often. I am not sure of the answer though, but I will keep pondering it. I was told that I should be in the moment fully and really listen to others speak. So I am always trying to  remember to do this. My memory loss makes it hard for me to remember current and future events so I use my calendar daily. At times, it is very difficult not to mourn my past life before my surgeries.

How do I enjoy life thoroughly? I have been told to treat the loss like a grieving process. Just to take one day at a time and just do my best each day. Life is very precious so I don’t want to take anything for granted. That is my goal anyway.

Sometimes life events get in the way so I need to focus on those completely. My husband and I remember the last dinner that my other father enjoyed. Dalton had always loved my husband’s fajitas. On the weekend night before his surgery, He was so happy to eat his favorite meal. He was anxious but hopeful about the upcoming surgery. Unfortunately, Dalton had a stroke during his cancer surgery. He lived, but wasn’t the same at all. There were many complications. We are all still grieving over our loss. This is when you would love to go back in time.

Surgeries haven’t been kind for my family. They have caused life changes so I advise people to proceed with great precautions about any surgeries in general.