The car that hit me caused me many long lasting repercussions such as memory lapses, walking with gait problems, and problem solving difficulties.

The head trauma that I suffered was caused by the damage from the impact of my head hitting the ground which caused my brain to move suddenly within my skull. The MRI screening showed a tiny pinpoint on my brain that was even damaged. My left side of my body was affected by it not delivering the correct signals from my brain to lift my leg high enough to clear the floor. I had to concentrate on picking up my left leg for each step I took to prevent myself from possible falling. Often times I did not clear the floor beneath me and consequently I then fell down many times. One time I fell down in a restaurant. It was embarrassing! It is very difficult to always have to remember.

It became necessary to make a very conscious effort not to reinjure my head again. If I even begin to stumble or to even to fall forward , I usually try to remember to always elevate my here ad. My doctor made a suggestion for me to be fitted for a leg brace that was designed to stop me from letting my foot drag. The problem was that I hate putting it on and it was so difficult to maneuver the brace into my shoe that many times I didn’t want to wear it. I am now wearing it when I need to walk longer distances. My stubbornness gets in my way at times.

After the first baclofen surgery, I had a routine visit to my doctor again where she monitored the levels of baclofen often to ensure that my pump was working properly. That day she seemed alarmed and she told us that I would need to go straight to the hospital now! My husband and I were so surprised at the urgency.

I ended up in the hospital that day again because the baclofen levels (a muscle relaxer) from my previous surgery were too low so I went into a state of withdrawal which caused me to itch all over my body that became very dangerous.

I understand what drug addicts feel like now. It was very painful and I was shaking everywhere. I was so sick to my stomach. I could not eat without vomiting. So I chose not to eat for several days until I felt better. This dream of walking again seemed distant again.

I finally did improve and was able to leave the hospital again. Thank goodness!

I tried to go back to teaching, but it turned out to be extremely difficult.   I was very stressed and it started to show in my demeanor. Everything took me much longer. My husband took me to my doctor who suggested for me to get testing. The cognitive tests were extremely difficult and I struggled.

Meanwhile my boss was giving me negative reviews on my observations. I was very worried about the possible outcomes. I was trying so hard, but it didn’t seem to make any difference.

When I got the results from my testing, the doctor then decided to put me on antidepressants. The tests showed that teaching was the worst kind of job for my type of head injury.   The job demanded that I be constantly multitasking from one activity to the next. I was not sleeping and was very anxious overall.

I loved my job, but it wasn’t enjoyable anymore and I was worried that I might get fired. So I decided to take an early retirement with disability during the following school year.

This really broke my heart. I always wanted to be a teacher since I was in Fifth Grade. So I started using the motto – “It is what it is!” This attitude helped me deal with reality, but my heart often aches for my most beloved job.

 

Each day since the car accident, certain things continue to be a struggle for me and I have to figure out how to do things that used to be natural. For example, something formerly simple like turning around to get something behind me will cause me to lose my balance and fall. If I fall, it is very frightening because I am not always able to get up off the floor. I always think of that commercial: An older lady says, ” I’ve fallen and I can’t get up! I used to laugh at that saying, but now I realize how that can be a dilemma in real life.

One of my struggles is trying to do laundry with my walker. I can’t really carry a laundry basket so I have to make numerous trips back and forth wearing myself out. I also lack having a sufficient memory to remember to take clothes out of the dryer before it shrinks or gets wrinkled.

Walking continues to be a great challenge for me since I have to concentrate on picking up my left leg that I call “Sylvester.” My right leg usually takes small steps even though there is nothing wrong with this leg. My right leg just doesn’t trust “Sylvester” so it begins to take small steps.   These tiny steps will cause me to lose my balance. This becomes a daily repeated cycle.

Another challenge is trying to get something up high from my kitchen shelf since I don’t trust myself on a stepladder. I usually decide to not to get it or do without.

Whenever I drop something, I ponder if it is worth taking the chance picking it up. My husband notices several items on the floor each day. My decision was made!

Hi, I am Lynette’s left leg that was damaged by the car accident. I try to make everything more difficult for her. The foot that is attached to me doesn’t pivot very efficiently and I often won’t enable her to pick me up high enough, which can make her trip and fall. I also stubbornly refuse to go forward without the right leg going ahead of me.

Recently, I am trying something new by buckling whenever she puts any weight on me. Now she is worried that she might not be able to walk. She really needs me!

Whenever she tries to get out of the car, I tend again to make things pretty difficult for her by refusing to move my foot. Then she has to step on it and then figure out how to maneuver it better. Now everything takes her much longer.

She is a determined one who won’t give up. She takes me walking on her trail in her backyard daily as well as riding her stationary bike. I remember she used to walk for hours on the weekends in her old neighborhood.

Sometimes she used to run up stairs with her arms up high above her shoulders like “Rocky”. She would imagine the music playing, “Gonna Fly Now!”  That memory is probably where she got the idea to call me “Sylvester?” I didn’t used to be so pesky; I used to help her walk and climb. She presently has to make every effort to encourage me to lift up while attempting her walking stride.

These days, I am trying to think up new ways to trip her up. For example, I don’t like to pivot very easily when she tries to turn around the walking trail with her walker. My job is such an easy one because I can refuse to allow her to turn around quickly. So this causes her to lose momentum so she will have to fight to continue to keep on struggling to keep going.

Well, I think overall she is a pretty good sport who won’t give up easily! Way to go, girl!

My other father who just said, ”Call me by my name only” is called Dalton. On Monday we were told to come and see him for the last time because he was dying. I was thinking about what a huge hole in my life that will leave me. He was always such a strong presence in my life. He always made me feel that he loved and cared for me. I will miss him greatly.

I remember that we went to go see my biological dad one weekend, and my sister and I found out that my mother had married Dalton who was already a good friend over that weekend. I accepted it easily and we got along. Dalton wanted to have an authoritative role in our lives. So my sister and I had to get used to it in a hurry.

We saw how much he cared for us in many ways. He and my mom arranged to buy my first car from our neighbor. It was an adorable blue Toyota. I loved that car so much. It was easy to drive because it was easy to maneuver even without power steering. I was the first of my friends to get my own car so I drove us everywhere. Dalton made sure that I always had at least half a tank of gas at all times for my safety. He was an excellent mechanic who could keep it running.

He was the smartest man in many ways. He was a wonderful artist as well and could draw a perfect clown. He was very knowledgeable about a variety of topics. He came from very poor conditions and joked that he was so skinny that he had to run around in the shower to get wet.

I remember that my job at home was to do the dishes before I went out. He would take his last bite of his dinner very slowly while I stood there waiting for his plate anxious to leave.

When I got married, I fretted about who was going to walk me down the isle and my mom said why can’t they both? My father and Dalton both walked me down the isle. I was very glad when they caught me from falling when my shoe stepped on my dress. I felt very blessed to have such strong men behind me.

Dalton passed away on October 28^th after a struggle with infections as well as a stroke during a previous operation for throat cancer. He will be greatly missed.

At the hospital, I was given several kinds of therapies: Cognitive and Physical. The cognitive therapy involves speech and memory. These involved memory strategies and techniques to help me to begin to retain information. I also learned how I should use these to make better decisions.

I was given stories and told to remember the many details in order. I hated these because there were too many events for me to recall. Another strategy was to say the alphabet backwards.   I was a good student in school who wanted to succeed. So I thought that all I needed to do was just work harder. My progress continued to yoyo from doing well and to back where I started. It felt like a hill that I couldn’t climb. My therapist would tell me to just relax and to expect setbacks. My memory would eventually return. This was excellent advice!

The next therapy was Physical. This was to reteach me the mechanics of walking. I suddenly realized how complex walking is when it is not natural. Many of my problems involved my balance. The Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) that I suffered caused lack of balance. My therapies were designed to improve balance and to force me to depend on my left leg. My right leg always tries to compensate for my left side.

My left side of my body was affected similar to a stroke victim.

I have to concentrate on every step to pick up this leg so I don’t trip and stumble. I realized that I have a long way ahead of me.

I stayed in the hospital for a month receiving intensive therapy. My memory was severely damaged and I also lacked motor skills on my left side of my body.

It was 21 days in the hospital before my memory started to return. I remember it as the time my teacher friends came to see me. I was thrilled and excited to see them while I was still coming to grips about why I was even in a hospital.

Then through the help of good friends and family members, who drove me back and forth to the hospital for more continued therapy, I slowly began my healing journey. It was a tough time for all involved and I am very grateful for their help during this upsetting time.

The doctors showed me the x-ray of my MRI examinations. It was just a pinpoint section of my brain affected. I had what is called a closed head injury caused by the sudden movement within the cranium skull (brain). This affected the blood flow and the pressure inside my skull.

My memory started to return slowly. I still continue to this day to have short-term memory losses.

I want to thanks friends and family for their help at this time.

When I was taken in an ambulance to the hospital, I was a Jane Doe. They did not know my name or how to contact my family. Meantime, my doctors were deciding if it was needed to relieve the pressure in my brain from the build up of blood flow within the skull. The doctors then decided that it wasn’t needed.

My husband shared with me the panic they felt when they couldn’t find me for hours because I wasn’t wearing any identification. That morning, I had meant to take my dogs walking with me, but I dreaded taking either of my unruly dogs so I opted not to take them with me at that time. I had never thought to wear my ID since I was only walking in my own neighborhood.

At the hospital, I didn’t remember some of my family members at first. My memory started to come back slowly. When my sister who lived in Georgia came to visit me. I was told I did not even recognize her. I told her that I have a sister who lives in Georgia also when discussing where my sister lived.  This had to be scary for her. To tell the truth, I don’t remember much until my teacher friends came to visit me several weeks afterwards.

When I met with my doctors they told us that I suffered a closed head injury caused by the sudden swelling of the blood flow within the cranium. On the x-ray, it was just a pinpoint area that was affected, but I it changed my life forever!

In the hospital, the doctors and nurses had difficulty keeping me from falling out of my bed since I was not aware that I couldn’t walk. Apparently I was not getting the correct signals from my brain to even walk so I had a bed alarm for my safety for a few days. I remember the doctor kept asking what day it was when he came in and I apparently gave some funny answers. It was like you were told something funny because everyone laughs and you don’t get what was so funny. For example, I did not know who the president was or the current year or what had previously been said to me. Everyone needed patience to deal with me at this time. Bless them!

I never thought my life would take such a drastic turn as it did late one summer day in 2001.

On the morning of August 1, 2001, I headed out for a short walk before going into my classroom to get it ready for the upcoming new school year. That fateful day was the beginning of a new chapter in my life and the future challenges ahead of me. That day, (the unthinkable happened), I was struck by a vehicle during that walk.

Fast forward to August 2014, where one day my husband walked into the house and suggested that I start writing down what my life has been like since that day.

Over the next several months, I will be posting pages in a blog about my life since that day in 2001 to the present. I will be sharing my struggles, my challenges, and my triumphs; what I thought were my lowest points, and the many high points.

I want to thank those who have been there for me during this journey assuring me that they would be there to catch me and hold me up when I thought I could not do it for myself.